D-R-A-M-A

Since I became a wife for the second time, and step-mom to three, it seems my life has way more drama than before. (I know you other stepmoms know what I'm talking about). Anyway, yesterday I walked down the stairs for my morning coffee - when I was surprised by my fully-clothed husband sleeping on the couch! It scared me because I wasn't expecting to see him. I woke him up and he told me his car wouldn't start, he thought it was the battery. So, as I left for work, he took off for Wal-Mart to get a new battery. They checked his car, said the battery was fine. Hm -mm they said that a couple of weeks ago, too, when he thought he needed a battery. He decides to take the car to our 'hometown' mechanic, Beach Boyz. They are swamped, but will try to get to it by the afternoon. He calls me at work at 9:30 a.m. to come pick him up at Beach Boyz and take him home.
While I'm driving to pick him up, Sarah calls. She needs to rent a car for her drivers license test tomorrow (because her mom's car won't pass inspection), and could I transfer $70...then a text message changing it to $50. I explain I'm on my way to pick up her dad, who is also having car trouble, and I will transfer the money when I get back to the office. On my way back to the office after dropping the husband off at home, she calls again - now the rental company needs to know there is $250 in the account (probably to cover the deductible)...she'll need $250 to put into her mom's account until they return the rental and then her mom will transfer it back. Uh, big RED Flag! (without spelling out the details, her mom has a habit of making everyone's money disappear). So, I call Ron and explain it to him -he agrees with me that if we transfer that money, it will be gone...forever.
Ron calls Sarah and advises her against it. She was worried about the same thing, but she doesn't want to miss her test. So, since he's off for a couple of days, he offers to let her use my car - they'll practice driving around tonight and then again before her 1:30 appointment tomorrow. She's a little unsure - but I remind her she wouldn't be familiar with the rental car either.
And that's what they did ... me, I stayed home and looked at a Scrapbooking magazine, enjoying the peace of a quiet (drama-free) house. It's good for now, but soon I'll be missing all of the drama ...

Summertime!

A couple of weeks ago, I went to my Mom and Dad's house. It was my Dad's birthday and I wanted to spend a little time with him and wish him a happy birthday. I also wanted to get dates and information on some 'old' pictures. (I hesitate describing them as 'old' because they are pictures of me!...so, you know - who wants to know they are old?!) Anyway, one of the pictures was me, just a few days before my 4th birthday, high atop my new slide in the backyard of our new house in Oklahoma City. (We all live in California now) Wow, it's amazing how one single image can bring back such a flood of memories! How well I remember spending so much time at the top of that slide - surveying the neighborhood, and singing at the top of my lungs! What song did I sing the most?...John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt!

(here are the lyrics)

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt,
His name is my name too.

Whenever we go out,
The people always shout,
There goes John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt.

La la la la la la la (repeat, each time getting softer)

It was also from this lofty perch that I would watch my parents and their friends from church (the young married w/children group) laugh and talk and have so much fun while making and eating homemade ice cream, or fresh watermelon. Remember the old (there's that word again!) ice cream freezers you had to crank by hand? The cranking started out easy, but as the ice cream got thicker, the cranking got harder, and the men usually had to take turns as their arm would get sore. I was usually the one to sit on a towel on top of the ice cream freezer, to keep the ice cream container from 'jumping' off of the turning peg at the bottom of the bucket. I'd have to move when they needed to check to see how 'hard' the ice cream was getting, or when they needed to add more ice and more rock salt. And when it was finally finished, nothing tasted better on hot, humid, Oklahoma nights than homemade ice cream...especially if you're sitting at the top of the slide in your own backyard. Just don't eat it too fast or you get major 'brain-freeze.' Aw- memories of summer and childhood...

These are the Days . . .

Time really does fly sometimes, and last week we watched Sarah, wearing her signature flip flops with her cap and gown, graduate with honors, from Mt. San Jacinto Community College. Amazing!

As with most Bennett family outings, this one was kind of a wild ride at times. Graduation was at 6:00 p.m. at the Ramona Bowl in Hemet. 51 minutes away according to Yahoo Maps. Ron got off a little early and was supposed to be home by 4:00 ... I worked my normal day, picked up the boys and was home by 4:15 - didn't figure it would take long to change clothes, (I wish I had a photo, because I had a really cute outfit on!) and get on the road by 4:30-ish. Uh...wrong, again. Ron wasn't home by 4:15, he wasn't home by 4:30, somewhere near 4:45 he walks in the door, hot and tired. Aaron, who decided he had to take a shower is still walking around in just a towel ... when he finally comes downstairs I'm grabbing a jar of peanut butter and a box of crackers to take with us. We have no time for dinner before we go...and we have no money to eat dinner out... he yells, "We have no dinner!" "No. Not really. Not until we come home, and then it's leftovers." He and Matthew grab a bag of Chex Mix and some chips ... we finally rush out the door, with barely 51 minutes until 6:00 p.m. How will we get there, park the car, and find seats in so little time? (You can imagine this is driving me crazy!)

According to the school's website there are over 1500 students receiving their degree tonight. We were so lucky Sarah is an Honors graduate, because they got to walk first. Even so, by the time they had the faculty speaker, and the student speaker, a musical number, it was 7:30 by the time she walked... and when she walked, we walked. We were starving, and knowing we were going to have to go home to eat anyway, there was really no way we could stay. Plus, we knew she would be going out afterwards with friends and her mom ... so, watching her walk was it for us. It was a beautiful venue, a beautiful night - perfect temperature. We walked back to the car, opened our crackers and peanut butter and chex mix and had a snack to see us home ...

I suppose these are some of the days and stories we'll remember and laugh about one day, but tonight not being part of the celebration afterwards, not having pictures taken with her in her cap and gown, not having money to eat out even without her joining us are not very fun days now. We are enormously proud of her though and that we can celebrate - even with peanut butter and crackers on the hood of the car...

I repeat...each day has enough trouble of its own!

Ha! Just re-read my 'toiling and spinning' post. The day after posting, we got the bad news that our a/c -heating unit has to be replaced. Ugh... our emergency fund didn't plan on that costly of an emergency and so, we'll be toiling and spinning (the numbers) trying to pay for the new a/c over the next 6 months. Yesterday I was totally freaking out, even had a mini meltdown over the situation...but as Matthew 6 states, no amount of worrying will change the situation. So, today I'm thankful we have friends who own a Plumbing and Heating business... who will let us take 6 months to pay... and thankful to God above who knew we needed Matthew 6!

Toiling and Spinning ...

Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life...See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. from Matthew 6

A couple of days ago, I was finishing the last few sips of my morning coffee, enjoying reading a few pages from Philip Gulley's book, Porch Talk. I love his books, they're inspirational, practical, and many times - like on this particular day, they really make me think about my life. The Slow Life was the chapter's title. It was talking about how we're so busy living the good life, we've forgotten how to enjoy life. That struck a chord with me. I've been thinking alot about the busyness of life these days, how we got where we are and is there really any chance of living (and enjoying) the slow life... The chapter ended talking about how Jesus always lived life at the right speed. I mean he only had three years in 'active' ministry to get things done, to train the disciples, to do everything... so how was he able to take the time to see situations and people that other people, who were living life in the fast lane, missed (or maybe just dismissed...)? The author quoted the scripture reference above, from Matthew 6, about worrying, and toiling and spinning ... toiling and spinning? sounds like my life right now. And yet, for all of the toiling and spinning I'm still not accomplishing what I want to get done. I'm still running out of time... more than that I get irritated and frustrated with those who are not living life as fast paced as I am thinking that if I'm toiling and spinning, they should be too! :) How crazy is that?!

So, I've decided two things. First, I'm going to focus my morning Bible reading on the life of Jesus, in particular the scriptures referring to when Jesus rested, spending time in prayer with the Father, refreshing and preparing himself for the journey...Secondly, I'm going to practice (and it will take practice) relaxing - pacing life to the right speed. Enjoying the relationships with my husband, stepkids, kids, grandkids and friends - trying not to worry about what's 'not getting done.' ...Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own... Ain't it the truth!

Rule #12

On our refrigerator, there's a list of "12 Rules to Live By," which I typed, printed, and laminated back in the early days of my marriage to Ron. We were having trouble with the boys' attitudes, etc. and these are pretty much common sense type things like If you open it, close it... if you break it ... fix it (or find someone who can)... After hanging on the fridge for 2-1/2 years, no one probably notices it or reads it anymore. Many times it's covered up by some other important paper - such as a current report card, or doctor appointment slip.

But today, I noticed it again peeking out from behind Aaron's report card and the winter break weightlifting schedule. I noticed it because Rule number 12 is ...12. "If it will brighten someone's day...say it." The boys are with their mom this week, but Aaron stopped by to pick up some more protein powder. When he walked in he said, "Hi... you look tired." (oh, gee - just what you want to hear even if it is true)...but then he asked, "How was the wedding yesterday?" ... "How have you been doing?" ... "Did you have a fun weekend?" I answered his questions, "Yes." "I am tired, we were gone all day yesterday with church, shopping, and the wedding." "We had a good weekend." How about you? He told me about his date (they went to Chipotle's and got a free meal because the beans weren't ready and they had to wait a long time.) He and his friend are going on a double date today - they are each dating girls on the soccer team. You know, just normal conversation ... but there was a time, back when I first posted rules 1-12, that we wouldn't have had that conversation. He wouldn't have asked how my day was, or told me about his ... but ah, what a difference it's made because back when I posted that list of rules to live by ... I lived by them too. I made it a point to ask them about something good that happened in their day ... and it's paying great dividends now. I still look tired, but it what he said (and asked) brightened my day today!

Maybe I was a blessing ...

I have worked as a church secretary for 18-1/2 years. Naturally, I have received many phone calls from people looking for help. Help with food, with rent money, with money for travel, money for gas, etc. Many of the ones calling for help say they are members of a "Church of Christ" in Arkansas, or Texas, or some other state in the mid-west. After a while, you can't help but become a little skeptical - especially when they say they are a member of a Church of Christ and yet ask to speak to the pastor. I'm sure many of the people have legitimate needs, and maybe some of them are church people, but a lot are not.



So, when I received a call yesterday from a young man who said he was getting out of prison the next day, but didn't have any clothes and asked if we had clothes ... I wasn't sure. He said he was a member of the church in Arkansas. Did I know of Harding (yes, a Church of Christ University)...in Searcy? (yes) ... Anyway, I told him we didn't have a clothes closet ministry - but I could give him the number of an organization, 'The Blessing Center,' which provides clothes, and food, etc. He wanted to know if there was a C of C in Colton... Yes, but they are a very small congregation, and I'm not sure what provisions they have but I would give him the number. We chatted a bit more ... he said he was embarrassed about his being in jail, that he had a plane ticket home ... just needed clothes. I wished him good luck and ended the call...

A few minutes later, the phone rang again. It was the same young man. He said, "I just called to thank you. I called The Blessing Center and they are delivering clothes to me when I get out tomorrow." I thanked him for calling, told him I was glad they had been able to help and wished him well. I hung up the phone - glad that I had taken the time to talk to him, glad he was able to get help, and that I was a part of it... you just never know. It is Christmas time, you know...