Rule #12

On our refrigerator, there's a list of "12 Rules to Live By," which I typed, printed, and laminated back in the early days of my marriage to Ron. We were having trouble with the boys' attitudes, etc. and these are pretty much common sense type things like If you open it, close it... if you break it ... fix it (or find someone who can)... After hanging on the fridge for 2-1/2 years, no one probably notices it or reads it anymore. Many times it's covered up by some other important paper - such as a current report card, or doctor appointment slip.

But today, I noticed it again peeking out from behind Aaron's report card and the winter break weightlifting schedule. I noticed it because Rule number 12 is ...12. "If it will brighten someone's day...say it." The boys are with their mom this week, but Aaron stopped by to pick up some more protein powder. When he walked in he said, "Hi... you look tired." (oh, gee - just what you want to hear even if it is true)...but then he asked, "How was the wedding yesterday?" ... "How have you been doing?" ... "Did you have a fun weekend?" I answered his questions, "Yes." "I am tired, we were gone all day yesterday with church, shopping, and the wedding." "We had a good weekend." How about you? He told me about his date (they went to Chipotle's and got a free meal because the beans weren't ready and they had to wait a long time.) He and his friend are going on a double date today - they are each dating girls on the soccer team. You know, just normal conversation ... but there was a time, back when I first posted rules 1-12, that we wouldn't have had that conversation. He wouldn't have asked how my day was, or told me about his ... but ah, what a difference it's made because back when I posted that list of rules to live by ... I lived by them too. I made it a point to ask them about something good that happened in their day ... and it's paying great dividends now. I still look tired, but it what he said (and asked) brightened my day today!

Maybe I was a blessing ...

I have worked as a church secretary for 18-1/2 years. Naturally, I have received many phone calls from people looking for help. Help with food, with rent money, with money for travel, money for gas, etc. Many of the ones calling for help say they are members of a "Church of Christ" in Arkansas, or Texas, or some other state in the mid-west. After a while, you can't help but become a little skeptical - especially when they say they are a member of a Church of Christ and yet ask to speak to the pastor. I'm sure many of the people have legitimate needs, and maybe some of them are church people, but a lot are not.



So, when I received a call yesterday from a young man who said he was getting out of prison the next day, but didn't have any clothes and asked if we had clothes ... I wasn't sure. He said he was a member of the church in Arkansas. Did I know of Harding (yes, a Church of Christ University)...in Searcy? (yes) ... Anyway, I told him we didn't have a clothes closet ministry - but I could give him the number of an organization, 'The Blessing Center,' which provides clothes, and food, etc. He wanted to know if there was a C of C in Colton... Yes, but they are a very small congregation, and I'm not sure what provisions they have but I would give him the number. We chatted a bit more ... he said he was embarrassed about his being in jail, that he had a plane ticket home ... just needed clothes. I wished him good luck and ended the call...

A few minutes later, the phone rang again. It was the same young man. He said, "I just called to thank you. I called The Blessing Center and they are delivering clothes to me when I get out tomorrow." I thanked him for calling, told him I was glad they had been able to help and wished him well. I hung up the phone - glad that I had taken the time to talk to him, glad he was able to get help, and that I was a part of it... you just never know. It is Christmas time, you know...

Did I tell him I loved him?...

October 23, 2009 - Yesterday Ron had a TIA (a mini-stroke), he was taken by ambulance to Loma Linda University Medical Center. He's OK, but driving home from the hospital last night, all I could think was, "Did I tell him I loved him?" We tell each other we love each other every time we talk on the phone during the day, at bedtime, when he tells me good-bye in the morning - but at this moment of crisis, I couldn't remember if I had told him or not and it bugged me. Funny the things we think about to avoid thinking what we don't want to think.

• I remembered saying, 'yes' when he asked me if I still loved him when I came home after he called to tell me he thought he'd had a stroke.
  
• I remembered telling him I loved him while in the ER...


• but as I said good-bye, before driving home - had I been so tired, so hungry, that I'd forgotten to say "I love you...forever."


• Fortunately, it wasn't a 'last' good-bye and when I called him before going to bed, I did tell him I loved him... and always will.

One Sentence for Today...

He hugged me good-bye ...

(A one-sentence journal entry, but a paragraph to explain it.) Matthew has a field trip today to see UCLA and Oregon State play football. It's extremely rare for us all to have breakfast together, but this morning we did before time for him to leave. As he put his dishes in the sink, he turned and said, "nice talking to you at breakfast." ... "Yes, it was. We don't get to do that much." Then as he headed out the door, he said good-bye, then came back and gave me a hug. A big moment from my 13-year-old stepson.

I finally remembered my camera

The game wasn't close, but it was exciting anyway, because Aaron (#50) played every play except for the kickoffs. And having fresh batteries in the camera, I was anxious to get pictures of him playing. It's just a simple point and shoot digital, but I got some pretty good shots, and footage. Aaron (and all of us have enjoyed this particular video most of all). It was a proud moment - makes all those practices worth it. Redlands wins 27-6

Normal Day . . .with a bonus

Ode to a Normal Day: Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. Let me hold you while I may, for it may not always be so. One day I shall dig my nails into the earth, or bury my face in the pillow, or stretch myself taut, or raise my hands to the sky and want, more than all the world, your return.

Being a creature of habit, I love normal days. Where routines and schedules are met without a lot of drama and minimal changes. Today is a normal day ... but a normal day with a bonus! That bonus has me smiling from ear to ear. It 's a post on facebook from my step-daughter, Sarah, who commented on my 'status' on Monday when I had so many 'mom errands' including taking Matthew to the doctor. The post read: 'best stepmom ever! :) You can see why I'm smiling. It's something to remember, to hang onto when the chaotic days happen, when there's too much drama, too many changes to the routine ... I can remember that the days of chaos have their place, too and in the meantime, even though I would still rather be scrapbooking ... I have an important job to do - stepmom to three teens ...

Welcome to my world!...

Well, in the more tales from the blender category... It was one of those mornings where I just woke up feeling overwhelmed. After 'cooking' dinner 3 times last night, (yes, 3 times) and doing dishes after each - the last time at 9:00 p.m. Is it any wonder I left the crock pot plugged in?